The Fake (but one-day-will-be-real) Wedding

OK, so here is the Type A in me: I'm planning my wedding early. How early? you might ask.

Early. So early, I don't even have a ring yet.

But no matter! I, just like every other woman out there, am thinking about that big day. I'm not booking locations -- though I admit to taking phone calls at work about venue sizes and catering costs -- I'm just sifting through all the wedding information out there so that when Chris proposes (and he will) I will be ready!

We agree that if we had $20,000 it would be put towards our first house, so we'd like to do a wedding under $10,000 for a few reasons:

• We don't have any more money than that to spend;
  
• It helps us keep our guest list in check since family members already make up about 60 people on our (preferably maxed at) 100-persons guest list;
  
• Chris bet me we could get married sooner rather than later if I could do it under $10k (and Lord knows that 's a bet I'd love to win).
  

And my goal, however impossible, is to do the ceremony and reception with 100 guests in tow (plus Bride and Groom) for $5-$7k max, attire and rings for $3-$5k max, and everything coming in under $10k. Chris didn't include rings in his bet, but I intend to. Why? Because I'm that good a at finding a deal. I could have my own series à la Dog: Bounty Hunter, but this time it could be Paige: Bargain Hunter. Of course, I don't have tattoos, sport a mullet, or carry a gun. Instead I wear eye liner, sport an angled crop 'do, and carry a handbag. Close enough.

The other thing to remember, as an FYI: Chris doesn't really get the whole "wedding" thing. I talked him into accepting marriage, but the big wedding just isn't his thing. Truth is though, I don't think it's mine either. So ladies, throw away your notions of yours truly in a big puffy white dress with 250 guests and a six-course meal. I'm going old school...

My ideas so far (and I promise there will be dozens more on this topic):

• Outdoor picnic/tea party theme
• Morning ceremony, noon reception, photos post-reception when everyone is just a little bit tipsy and very, very, very happy
• simple lace dress: sweetheart neckline and mermaid fit
• vibrant-coloured shoes
• Purple iris bouquet
• No attendants (but if we have any, just the MOH and BM for signing the registry)
• BBQ steak from my grandparents' Maple Manor Farm, baked potatoes, cold salads
• Handmade invites and a wedding website for RSVPs